The odds are pretty high that anxiety will elbow its way into your life or that of someone you love.
can vary so widely depending on factors like their specific diagnosis, personality, life experiences, the kind of day they’re having, and more. “Some people may want support, some people may want advice, some people may want people to just leave them alone,” Antony says.
Rachel has also found it helpful for the friend in question to count out loud as a way to help her focus on her breathing and slow it down. “Encouraging the individual to slow down breathing can be useful,” Antony says. Whether or not it helps and how exactly to go about it will depend on the person and your relationship, but if they’re really having a hard time breathing at a normal pace, it could be worth a try.
This might feel weird to do, but if you frame it as being concerned about how your friend might cope when you can’t be there—not about feeling burdened or irritated—they’ll hopefully understand. That’s especially true if you underscore it with the message that you want to help them manage their anxiety as best as possible in the long term, not just in the moments when you’re able to be by their side.
“If somebody is feeling anxious, they [might be] feeling threatened and endangered,” Antony explains. “Saying things that are critical or applying pressure to the person, those sorts of things will often the increase anxiety levels.” He strongly cautions against saying things like, “You're being so sensitive” or “I promise, if you stop worrying things will get better.
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