Dear Abby gives advise on an unusual honeymoon situation and helps a woman whose husband attends weeks-long music festivals every year.
: My wife and I have assisted a local youngster who was abandoned at birth and bounced through foster care. We helped him finish college and start his first job.
Here’s the problem: “Samuel” has become engaged to an attractive, professional woman my wife and I both like. However, he just told us she insists upon bringing her parents on the honeymoon. Her parents feel strongly that they should go, even to the extent of arguing with Samuel about it. I have never heard of anything like this. His fiancee is 28 years old. I’m very wary about it.
In truth, I feel like a burden to him, and he prefers going solo to “get a release” from the everyday responsibilities of our life together. Each year, I ask him not to go, but he does it anyway. I’d greatly appreciate your insight about this. —: You are not a “burden.” You are shouldering the entire responsibility of caring for the family while he goes off and indulges himself.
While I would equate your husband’s escape to the music festival with the hunting and fishing trips some husbands take each year, the difference is that there are fewer “temptations” on those other outdoor pastimes. If he’s a good husband the other 51 weeks of the year, and there is nothing you can do to dissuade him, then dwell on the positive. If he isn’t, you may have some serious thinking to do about whether you want to remain in this marriage.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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