Dementia: At lunchtime, my Mum knew I was her daughter. By evening, nothing

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Dementia: At lunchtime, my Mum knew I was her daughter. By evening, nothing
DementiaStroke
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Anthea Rowan cared for her mother in the last 18 months of her life, witnessing the illness 'lick away at her like a river a sandy bank until she crumbled completely’

Anthea Rowan cared for her mother in the last 18 months of her life, witnessing the illness ‘lick away at her like a river at a sandy bank until she crumbled completely’whispered its way into our world with dropped words , urinary incontinence and lost geography .

I cared for my mother in the last 18 months of her life, witnessed this horrible illness lick away at her like a river at a sandy bank until she crumbled completely and there was nothing left of her clever conversation and little of her physical self. It whittled her like a stick as it stole her appetite and her mobility.

Sometimes dementia is a loaded gun; you’re going to get the single bullet in a chamber anyway, whatever you do: Russian Roulette. Sometimes it isn’t. The only thing that I know for certain now is that it isSo many people think it is. A friend says, “My father went senile so I’m bound to.” Such glib complacency, as if he were announcing, ‘My grandfather went bald, so I’m bound to.’ : Did he not bear witness to his father’s coming-undone? It is brutal. It is not a soft, sweet fraying.

I Zoom doctors and experts in this thing. They tell me that while my genetic map might predispose me to, also it might not. And even if I develop the pathology of the disease, they say, reassuringly, I might not be undone by its symptoms if I can bank a cognitive reserve like layers of fat for lean times later, a dam against the emptying drought of dementia. And how do I do that, I press: ‘Stump yourself’, they urge: ‘Do hard stuff’, they elaborate.

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