It means I am the only person standing between me and my children and whatever storm threatens to batter us.
It means at any given moment I am starkly aware of the fact that if I get hurt or sick, they will be left completely alone.
It means I have to give them twice as much, even if I feel half as capable. It means they only get me, when they should have gotten us. To be clear, I don’t believe and am not saying that solo parenting is harder than single parenting. When it comes to the relationship between divorced couples or separated couples or whatever other dynamics exist in between, I can imagine scenarios where the two parents struggle to find any common ground and even the simplest of decisions become lengthy battles.
But I’m not writing to win a “who is suffering more” contest. I’m writing because solo parenting is not single parenting, and there’s so much value in being seen, in having your particular struggles validated. I’m writing because once upon a time, I called myself a single parent, and the title simply didn’t fit, and when I found a title that fit better, it was a little easier to breathe, and I felt a little less alone in my experience, a little less lonely.
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