“My daughter’s name is Roux. I started dating her dad when I was 17 years old, and I ended up getting pregnant when I was 19. After we broke up, I was only 20, so it was a crazy transition from independence to parenthood.”
, you're told to stay in a child's place. You're told to stop crying, to not be so emotional. I know exactly how that affected me: it made me an anxious person. It made me go into a shell, to not trust my feelings. I was insecure and scared of myself, honestly, and that’s something that I don't want my child to ever feel. I don't think my parents did that intentionally; it’s just a matter of how they were raised and what they knew at the time.
The majority of my friends don't have kids, and they're older than me, so it can be a little lonely at times. You feel misunderstood because you’re dealing with things that they can’t relate to right now. And then, when you’re around older moms, they look at you funny because your way of doing things is. I feel like with a lot of Gen Z parents, the main focus with parenting is allowing our kids to be themselves and to cultivate their respective voices.
The key to healthy co-parenting is being honest, being raw, being real, and getting to the root of whatever the issue is. I'm at a space in my life right now where I don’t harbor anger or any other negative feelings. So much of that pain derives from hurt, which derives from just wanting to be loved, and when we speak honestly from that space of our needs, we can get through to each other a lot faster. That's what I had to do with Roux’s dad, and he did the same thing for me.
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