I didn’t even know the guests, and I definitely didn’t know I’d have to pay.
I told her I had to think about it. I live here, too, and the common areas are shared spaces. I probably wouldn’t have even bothered attending the party had I known I’d have to split a few hundred dollars’ worth of food with people I don’t even know.
I’m not sure of the proper thing to do in this situation, and there is a lot of tension between us right now.“If we were giving a joint party, then of course I would share the costs. But you invited me to this last-minute, and there was no talk of splitting it. Next time, please give me fair warning that your friends are coming over and I will do my best to vacate the premises.”
Miss Manners would be tempted to add how far from “fair” it was for your roommate to charge her other guests, but one confrontation is probably enough for now — especially when you need to continue to live with this person.For the past two years, we have been living behind masks as we strive to keep from spreading, and contracting, COVID-19. Although they help reduce contagion, masks also eliminate handy facial characteristics that help us identify people.
Given this constraint, I’m wondering if there might be some polite way to say, “Who are you?” when people greet me. With nothing to go on besides eye color and voice, I often have no way of knowing who they are.A quizzical look — from a respectful distance — may help the masked person realize that they are difficult to identify. Or Miss Manners has found the more proactive, “Hi! It’s me, Jerry!” from the person being stared at to be helpful and ingratiating.
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