She’s 90 years old, and they impose on our hospitality.
When did this become OK? My mother won’t let me at them to make it crystal clear, as she thinks I am being rude.to be rude, and she is right to stop you, if only until you slow down enough to allow for there being more than 36 hours between Tuesday and Friday.
Hosts can set the dates in advance: “Please come on Friday and stay until Monday.” It was never polite for a guest to arrive unannounced or outstay an invitation, but that never justified rudely demanding a departure date. Miss Manners also wonders who has been sinned against in this case, if your mother is, as she appears to be, the hostess and perhaps also the owner of the establishment.How can one respond when bumping into a friend they haven’t seen in a year or so, and the first thing the friend says is, “Where haveThe tone of voice suggests that I am hiding and being unsocial, when in fact the friend hasn’t reached out to me, either, during that time.
I also experience this at a nonprofit organization where I have been a volunteer for years, helping out when my schedule allows. A couple of people who spend a regular amount of time there greet me with, “Oh, are you here to help today?” Of course they know I am there to volunteer, and their catty tone suggests that they’d almost forgotten about me. Meanwhile, I have been at the organization longer than they have and even helped to train them!Though such greetings are understandably off-putting, Miss Manners notes that they gain the greeter nothing when they appear to slide off the recipient without effect.
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