SexDiaries: 'I have to ask him if he’s a model or an actor … his hotness makes no sense to me. I’ve been in the area for a few years working for my family’s company and I know all the hot guys. I’m on all the apps. Where has Cam been hiding?'
Illustration: Marylu E. Herrera This week, a woman who’s tired of the apps and is dead set on going on a date with a new guy who’s in town: 24, single, upstate New York.8:30 a.m. Wake up after 12 hours of sleep. I have a very cushy life right now. I’m living with my parents, doing low-stress work helping them with their real-estate business, and having good times with my friends from high school who are still around.
He drives away after some mild flirtation, and I plot my next move. We exchanged numbers when organizing the handoff, so I’m all set.5 p.m. Driving to the grocery store and listening to “Shallow.” It makes me think of Cam. I’m a dork! I decide to text him from the parking lot while the air-conditioning blasts and I’m happy and comfortable: “You’re meeting up with me tonight.”8 p.m. “Done.” Now I just have to come up with a plan for us. I know he’ll do whatever I say, but I have to get creative.
3 p.m. I’m really excited. He’s so hot! I’ve always liked the really hot ones. It’s a problem, as they’re all dicks in the end, but I’m also aware that I’m only 24, and … who cares? I had a long-term boyfriend in college but we went our own way after graduation. 1 p.m. At least this delay means I can get an appointment at the blow-out place I like. I end up getting a manicure there too.
We’re vibing really well. He’s quiet and I’m noisy. I want to fuck him so bad. I know he’ll never make the first move. “Let’s go back to your place.” He quickly pays the bill and we go. I love how not-shy he was about my suggestion. 11 p.m. I’m home. I feel weird. It was such a hot hookup, but the apartment creeped me out, and I think I never want to see Cam again.9:15 a.m. I take a long, hot shower. I kind of want to cry. So much build-up, and then a powerful orgasm in the middle of that weird house, and now … nothing. It’s just an odd feeling.
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