A recent incident of vomit at an Ireland rugby match has sparked a national conversation about fan behaviour and the impact of alcohol consumption at sporting events. The author shares his humorous take on the situation, highlighting the absurdity of projectile vomit becoming a topic of post-match analysis.
Come the day, come the hour, come the power-propelled vomit. I was never a fan of Phil Coulter's rugby song, but my adapted version might encapsulate the downs and ups of an Ireland match day. The four proud provinces have been answering Ireland 's call, but it's challenging. We've learned you run a risk of being tackled high by projectile sick. The song says 'side by side we stand like brothers, one for all and all together, we will stay united through darker days'.
But you have to draw the line somewhere, and if someone decides to abandon their brother-like comrades having been vomited upon, then - in my opinion - hanging up is fair enough. If you're wondering what I'm on about, first of all thanks for staying with me up to this point, and second of all, here's a bit of background... Ireland played England in rugby in the Aviva Stadium. Among those answering Ireland's call in the crowd was a man called Simon. But having answered Ireland's call, he ended up calling Liveline. Simon's mates were vomited upon by someone sitting behind them - the worst kind of forward pass imaginable. Simon told Liveline: 'There was a bunch of young lads behind us... they were enjoying the beer... with about 15 minutes to go one of them decided to barf all over us'. Simon added: 'It won't stop me from going to matches again'. Wow, Simon must really love rugby. Then he said: 'But I'll certainly be looking carefully over my shoulder'. So I feel sorry for Simon, not just because of the vomit but because he'll pay for tickets to another match but won't be looking at the pitch. The vomiter, I'd imagine, had no idea at that fateful moment that his unfortunate involuntary stomach reflex would become a national conversation. But here we are. And while I'd always welcome an opportunity to not talk about rugby, it's not ideal that a vomit has dominated post-match analysis. There's the argument that those having pints during the match aren't interested in what's happening on the pitch and shouldn't be there. Which is fair enough. There's the argument that those having pints during the match are always getting up and going to the toilets which is annoying. Which is fair enough. There's the argument that most of us should be able to go a short while without a pint - even if we're having to endure rugby. Which is fair enough. I think though, we can all agree that the vomiting should be kept to a minimum. Even if it's not a projectile one it's still very much a slip hazard. But most of all, the reason to not drink at a match is because there's no circumstances where a pint is enjoyable in a plastic cup. It's the plastic cup that offends me most. It's just as well that we clamp down on it at the football - we're far too civilised for that. Meanwhile... Sometimes I get in the car and go for a drive when I know Brian O'Driscoll will be on Newstalk talking about rugby. There's something relaxing about time to myself listening to Brian speak perfect English yet not understanding a single word he says. The Newstalk guys will ask Brian a question - then off he'll go. For minutes on end, in that soft Varadkar-esqe accent of his, making no sense to me whatsoever. It all sounds very interesting and profound, and I am certain Brian knows what he's talking about - it's just that I don't. And, as I listen, any troubles or worries float out of my head and are replaced with thoughts of mysterious things like gain lines and blindside flankers. And as long as the flankers aren't doing blindside vomits, I strongly recommend it
RUGBY IRELAND ALCOHOL FAN BEHAVIOR SPORTS ETIQUETTE COMEDY
Ireland Latest News, Ireland Headlines
Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.
France outhalf Romain Ntamack set to be available to play against Ireland after three-match suspensionRomain Ntamack will miss France’s Six Nations clash against England on Saturday
Read more »
Romain Ntamack Receives Three-Match Ban for High TackleFrench rugby star Romain Ntamack has been suspended for three matches following a dangerous high tackle during the opening Six Nations game against Wales. Although initially facing a six-match ban, Ntamack's suspension was reduced due to his guilty plea, remorse, and good conduct. He is likely to miss only two games and could return for France's match against Ireland on March 8th.
Read more »
Ireland Take Lead Over Zimbabwe in Intriguing Test MatchIreland lead Zimbabwe by 76 runs after the second day of a captivating one-off Test match in Bulawayo. Captain Andy Balbirnie remained unbeaten on 32 for Ireland, who reached 83-1 by the close. Earlier, Zimbabwe fought back with a heroic last-wicket stand between Blessing Muzarabani (47) and Trevor Gwandu (18), and a debut century from Nick Welch (90).
Read more »
David Cameron at Ireland-England Rugby Match, Political News from IrelandThis article covers multiple topics from Irish politics and society. It starts with David Cameron's attendance at the Ireland-England rugby match, then delves into Labour Party events, the upcoming Seanad election, and the transition of former Fine Gael TD for Mayo into political retirement.
Read more »
Kerry Edges Out Derry in Thrilling Allianz Football League MatchKerry and Derry engaged in a dramatic encounter in the Allianz Football League Division One, with the final score reflecting the nail-biting back-and-forth action. Paul Geaney's late goal sealed the victory for Kerry, who overcame a seven-point deficit against Cork in Newry to win by one.
Read more »
Irish Rugby Players Recover from Injuries, Squad Updates Ahead of Next MatchIrish rugby management is optimistic about the recovery of Finlay Bealham and Mack Hansen from leg injuries sustained during their recent victory over England. The IRFU provided updates on other injured players and announced new additions to the squad for their upcoming match.
Read more »