‘When I close my eyes at night, I can still see that bird’s horrible, leering face’

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‘When I close my eyes at night, I can still see that bird’s horrible, leering face’
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Ross O’Carroll-Kelly: It’s the old man’s birthday, and Ronan has brought a surprising present to cheer him up

But the old man – standing at the bottom of the stairs in Shanahan’s on the Green – barely raises a smile.The old dear, who’s linking his orm, goes, “Happy birthday, Dorling!” and she smiles at him with a face on her like the fish option.Ross O’Carroll-Kelly: ‘Sorcha, I honestly don’t think we can just saunter in here like nothing has happened’

She’s there, “Sad about the rugby, wasn’t it?” because she’s obviously wondering is that what he’s, like,He goes, “Yes, I’m sure they did, Sorcha.” He goes, “The thing attacked me, Ross, in broad daylight. And absolutely nothing is being done about it.”I’m there, “Dude, you need to get over it,” because I’m calling it. “Seagulls have been dicks for years. And they’re probably going to go on being dicks.”

I’m there, “Are you not eating your bone-in rib-eye? Honor, throw me over his bone-in rib-eye there, would you?”The old man’s like, “Say something? Say what?”

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