Ask the Expert: When I try to intervene, she does not respond well
Parents often have strong reactions to their children’s behaviour that comes from their own experiences. For example, were you a quiet or bossy child growing up? Were you like your daughter or different? What were your experiences like at her age? Taking time to reflect like this will help you understand where your feelings are coming from. For example, it could be that your daughter’s behaviour is pretty normal but it reminds you of struggles in your own childhood.
In shaping your daughter’s behaviour, the goal is to make sure your approach is primarily positive. You should try to offer at least five encouragements to every single criticism or suggestion. This way you can preserve your daughter’s self-esteem and she is much more likely to listen to you. Your daughter is very young. Be very patient, enjoy her confident personality and encourage her strengthsIf you are worried about how a social situation might go, it is a good idea to coach her in advance and to set her up for success. For example, if she is meeting her cousin, you might discuss the games they might play and how they might take turns. You could also rehearse how she might ask her cousin for ideas about games and how she can listen to her choices.
In addition, when the two girls are together you could sit with them and model turn-taking during a game. “Now it is N’s turn. Let’s wait to see how she gets on. Well done, N.” With a little bit of support and scaffolding your daughter can see the benefit of more co-operative play. You can also reinforce this when you talk later – “That was great the way you played with N; it was great the way you got her involved in the game.
Finally, your daughter is very young, and it is developmentally normal at her age to be a bit “bossy” and to not yet know how to include others equally. Be very patient, enjoy her confident personality and encourage her strengths. Then she is likely to make the progress she needs in her own time.
Ireland Latest News, Ireland Headlines
Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.
RTÉ viewers question 'mad' episode of Angela Scanlon's Ask Me AnythingRTÉ viewers had a few questions after tonight's episode of Angela Scanlon's Ask Me Anything had guest Joel Dommett show off his bizarre party trick
Read more »
Child expert and mum's five steps to instantly stop a tantrum in its tracksThe tantrum is your child's way of drawing attention to their feelings says parenting expert Sheila O’Malley, so find the feeling and you've won half the battle.
Read more »
Feed your family for less than a fiver with these tips from Dublin budget expertWith the average families’ food bill rising by more than €1,000 year on year, the mum-of-two insists fakeaways are the best bang for your buck.
Read more »
Lawyer warns against ‘vilifying’ patients who bring cancer screening cases against HSESpecialist barrister also says judges’ suggestions that expert witnesses are ‘guns-for-hire’ are completely without basis
Read more »