Opinion: Dr Caroline West says we know about 'red flags' in relation to consent, but it's worth thinking about 'green flags', the communication skills that work.
Dr Caroline West WHEN DISCUSSING HEALTHY and unhealthy relationships, people may have heard of red flags – behaviours to watch out for that are warning signs that there is potential for abuse in the relationship.
Gaslighting is psychological abuse and happens when the abuser makes the victim doubt their memories. They will minimise what happened or tell the victim it never happened. This can impact the victim and cause brain fog, anxiety, and confusion, which makes it hard to name what is really going on. Others outside the relationship tend to take a more black-and-white view, and it is easier to see the red flags when we aren’t emotionally involved and subject to confusion, gaslighting, and trauma.
Being able to openly discuss contraception is another green flag, as safer sex is an essential component of sexual wellness.Generally, healthy relationships involve supporting each other to be independent and successful, maintaining friendships and hobbies, paying bills equally, and being open to working through issues.
Related Reads 29.11.21 Opinion: Education must be at the heart of all efforts to create a culture of consent 02.11.21 Opinion: It took me years to realise I'd been raped - I had never been taught about consent 22.09.21 Dr Caroline West: It is vital we stop victim blaming when it comes to sexual assault
Knowing about green flags can help us to enjoy positive sexual rights and have the kind of relationships that nourish us on a sexual, physical, and emotional level.
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