Why the Pursuit of Happiness is Overrated, According to a Psychologist

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Why the Pursuit of Happiness is Overrated, According to a Psychologist
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Our brains are wired for fun over happiness.

. “It’s not because we value happiness or strive to flourish, but it becomes an over-concern with the many external messages of motivation. Folks who see happiness so far in the distance end up using time for introspection to commiserate the distance between where they are and where they want to be.”

This leads to not utilizing time efficiently and progressively beginning to identify as an unhappy person, according to Dr. Rucker. “Once you get on that downward spiral, it becomes an exercise of confirmation bias, and you start to see things in that negative way as well,” he says. Instead, Dr. Rucker says your time would be better spent focusing on having fun.“Happiness is a byproduct of fun,” Dr. Rucker says.

When we seek happiness, we’re in a constant state of evaluation, which doesn’t benefit us in the long run. “As soon as we train our brains into accepting the agency and autonomy we have over ourselves, joy and overall happiness will slowly but surely automatically increase,” Dr. Rucker says.Dr. Rucker highly recommends doing an audit of how you spend your time and eliminating or delegating anything that isn't enjoyable wherever possible.

You can start by looking at your calendar and removing activities or tasks that are no longer enjoyable but habitual. “It’s not about adding to your schedule, but swapping things out that don’t bring you joy,” he explains. “This is why a lot of workplace wellness initiatives don’t work—they’re additive.”

But the real change will come when you notice how great you feel after reclaiming some time for fun. “It’s not selfish," Dr. Rucker says."It allows you to show up as the best version of yourself." If you need more convincing to get over any guilt you may feel, Dr. Rucker has some parting words of wisdom:"Remember, it’s not just for you, but also everyone around you.”

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